Wedding in France! Ce n'est pas moi!

I got invited to my first french wedding. American girl invited me to her wedding outside of France. But of course we must go over the bachelorette party details first! 

All Bachelorette parties should take place in Paris as they are crazy and the french guys think all American girls in groups are tons of fun. (which we are!)  

Just so you know...I just found this post after I revived this blog...so I am finishing this story from NYC (May 28, 2009)  

I went to my American girlfriend's apartment to meet up with her and the girls.  She is from my hometown (Richardson TX) and we happened to go to junior high and high school together!  Weird. I arrive at said apartment dans la quinze (15th arr).  All her girlfriends attended UT and OU.  I attended OU so we are all immediately fast friends.  I especially bond with Tiffany.  She is really into horoscopes and seems to be doing a little soul searching of her own.  Everyone is dolled up and has flown in for a night of party time!  We are finishing up final touches while drinking champagne at the apartment.  And we're off!  We head to Music Hall for dinner.  Tres Chic!  We are seated at a large table for the 8 of us.  Just a few tables away is a group of french young good looking men who enter the story later.  We are

 guzzling champagne and dining on fantastic food, we are getting louder (typical americans!) and giggling.   As dinner comes to a close we engage in excessive picture taking.  The waiter is taking tons of pics and enter stage left cute french boys.  They come over and volunteer to take the pics.  Of course, we ask them to get into the pics also.  We tell them it is a bachlorette party and we are headed to a club (which I can't remember the name of now).  We arrive at the club and the shots and champagne immediately are ordered.  Very soon after cute french guys arrive...more drinks and more drinking ensues.  

There is some petting going on between some of the french guys and some of the girls all very tame but interesting none the less.

Bride to be gets the hottest of the group to take off his shirt at the bar (see photos).  Night progressively got more and more blurry and hang overish.  I think I left, no boy, no pics that are TOO terribly incriminating but he definitely will not be running for any public office...ever!  

Update

Since we last spoke...

I got fired from my job the night before I left for Italy. My employers could not afford to pay me. Fell in love with Italian man in Bari Italy. Returned back to Paris broken hearted and unemployed. I am almost out of money and good ideas for ways to extend my stay without completely running out of money. So, I received an email while in Bari from a guy who has a job opening. Meaning, I had sent him my CV and now there is an opening. I have no idea when or what this job was applied for? I respond I will contact him when I return. I return to no phone and no internet in Paris. This place can be trying at times!!!!!! I call him on my cell phone the next day and he does not remember who I am? Okay, he says he will call me back and I know he will not b/c he has no recollection of contacting me (two days ago?). How does this country function with people that can't remember who they emailed two days ago for a job opening? I mean how much wine did Patrice drink at lunch to forget me? He does not call but I reply to his previous email and nicely say "I am sorry we were not able to connect today but I am still interested in the below opportunity" etc. He never calls!!!!!!! BASTARD! Doesn't he know how desperado I am???? So, fast forward to today...he calls me this morning pretends nothing is wrong and asks me to come for an interview. I agree and ask him for address etc and too send the job description since he never said what that was! It is now almost midnight the night before and he has not sent me the email. I will call him in the morning so I know where I have to go for this interview but let me tell you I don't have much confidence that this is going to be the dream job I was hoping for! Also, went to a trade show on Monday with Frenchy, he offered to hire me part time and temporarily to get me by. I will start working for him on Monday...

La Rentree.....

So I decided to continue this thing out of pure boredom! I have been out of internet access for about 3 weeks now. Nothing sucks like living in a foreign country alone with no internet. I can't even pretend to know what is going on in the world. I only have 4 channels in France and French news is no good and the international herald tribune is 2 euros and really not that interesting most of the time. I prefer to get some news and the rest gossip. What can I say ...I am proud to be an American?

Introduce new storyline here...

Sometime end of July I was introduced online to some Italian men for travel tips by my Russian friend. We were talking about taking a vacation to Italy. Why not? She sends me a text and tells me to meet her online (MSN) and she will introduce me to her friends b/c they are both single. I agree and long story short I am introduced online to Vittorio and Massimo? Pics get exchanged and Vittorio looks like the cute one and he is talking to my Russian friend. Massimo is pretty cute and does not speak (write) very good english. We talk abit and Vitt and Russian have to go to bed. I continue to talk to Mass. Mass and I begin talking online everyday. Russian and I decide to go to visit these guys in Bari Italy for a week. It was the best trip. I completely fell for Mass and now here I am back in Paris. My luck!

Paris is on Vacances

For those of you that are jealous of me living in Paris...don't be! Right now Paris is soooooooooooooo boring. I mean during the week it is not so bad, I can go to some stores (grocery) and I do have a job now. BUT, the weekends are painful! Literally, everyone is gone! The clubs are closed, resturants, even my pharmacy is closed for vacances. WHAT the HE**? So, last week was kinda fun. Here is what went down. I caught up with my American friend PJ and his two friends some dude Ray and his "blind date" Aussie guy (don't remember his name). Not really a date Ray is not gay but they had not met before and so I call it a blind date! Anyway, we meet for drinks dinner etc. It was pretty cool then moved on to a Pub to have cheap beer on Ray's coupon card. Ray is apparently quite the regular at this spot. We are chatting and having good convo when my blog comes up. I have been keeping quite a bit of very interesting information from all of you as family reads this blog and I have to keep it clean. So, I am thinking of creating the real version of my life "unedited". I feel that this one is just getting boring and I hate to update it with my PG version of life. Ok, so that was that night next night I have a picnic with AP (frenchy friend of my bro). I go to meet him after work at the Paris Plage with a bunch of other french people. It was fun, great food, good practice on the french skills and then went a had a drink with an english couple. I did nothing this past weekend and it rained all weekend. Sorry, even I am tired of this blog! comments???

JOB ...

It is good thanks for asking! I love it ...so far. It has been about a week and it is great. Last Friday they had "clients" in to look at their stuff. After the entourage left we had our usual glass of wine to finish the day. Reason #99 why I love it here... So, "boss" tells me do you know who that was? I reply "no?" He tells me it was the biggest Turkish industrialist (in Turkey of course) and his wife who owns the largest newspaper in Turkey, their decorator who is married to Ray Charles old manager??? Anyway, big shots nonetheless. They flew in from Turkey to Paris to see our stuff and she flew from Brazil on another job. Must be nice, eh? If we get this job it could be big since this house they are decorating in Turkey is HUGE!!!!!!!!!!!! I on the other hand have not gotten any sales yet (it has only been one week) but have had lots of interesting conversations. People in the states love when you tell them you are calling from Paris! It gives you some kind of authority to be put through to the big shots or a good in for convo! Here is how the conversation goes down:
ring, ring...random designer receptionist or actual snotty designer answers...
them: ABC interiors inc?
me: Hi, yes I am calling from Paris, France for (*&(*& decorative arts company can I talk to John?
them: um, he's not available can he call you back or voicemail.
me: well, I am calling from Paris France i wanted to talk to John live as the time difference makes it more difficult to get in touch.
them: What...uh, oh? Paris ...France...really??? What time is it there? WOW? Is the weather nice, oh you are so lucky, that is my favorite city, have you been to blah blah blah
me: (thinking...score, I love my job!) yes, it is great don't you wish you were me? yes, I love it here!!! Is John available ? Oh he is great...you'll put me right through??? thanks!!!
So, that is my day!

Jealous, yes I know...

Brazilian night out...

Last weekend was my night out with Fufi. Brazialian hottie from previous blog. We agree to go to dinner at La Cantina on rue Faubourg. Tres Cher! We agree to share a cab there and are bonding along the way. Fufi is looking like her usual model self this evening. We get to restaurant and it is so NYC. Music is pumping and we are escorted to our table past groups of people watching and being seen. After dinner a group of guys are seated at the table next to us and are youngish international looking. Fufi has to go to the bathroom so I am at table alone. I am approached by a guy from next to us asking me to join them for drinks. I tell him when Fufi gets back I will let him know. In the meantime the hostess approaches and asks what are plans are later? We tell her we are going to some nightclubs. She asks us if we would like a ride with their complimentary car service? F-Yeah! This makes it well worth the 27 euros I paid for my piece of fish the size of a peanut! She provides us with a ticket and tells us to ask for Jean- someone when we get our outside and he will take us to our destination. Cool!???? Fufi gets back I tell her about boys she says no, they are not cute but we will take the ride! So, I go to the bathroom and before I am done Fufi is waiting for me next to the sinks. She said she was getting bothered by men. Well, when you look like a model I guess that is a problem, right? We hightail it outta there to get our free ride! We head to Cabaret where Fufi knows some people. We get out and the security guards all recognize her. The manager comes out and kisses her and me and personally escorts us into the club to the VIP section and sits us with some Italian men with bottle service. He gives us a wink and kisses and he is gone. The Italians smile (what good fortune they have) and offer us drinks from there bottle. We happily accept, begin the french kisses and intros. I can't remember any of their names except an Antonio? Fufi and I are dancing having a good time and it is hot as usual. After 2 hours of sweating and dancing we decide to head out. Mind you Fufi has been hit on numerous times now but nothing interesting. Me..nada except old Italian dude who is gross! We bail and try to head to other clubs but it is night before holiday and all are closing. Summary of story ...I don't know if Fufi is lesbo/bi but she did not hit on me. I am either not her type or Brazilian women are just affectionate when dancing??? I thought she was nice so we are going out again this Saturday.

Bastille Day - Delayed

Sorry fellow readers it took awhile to get the pics so here you go. These are pics of us sitting on the Champs des Mars watching the fireworks on Bastille Day.

July 14, 2006

I GOT A JOB!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So, I don't know how else to put it but F - yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!

Okay, the fine print starts here. It is not the composites company. I got word on Friday that I did not get the job. BUT, I got a call from my bro's frenchy alum friend here on Monday night that he had a lead for me. We spoke briefly and agreed to talk the next morning about the details. Tuesday we get the scoop. I call the guy right away and he asks me to come and meet him that day. A little background, it is a high end decorative arts company. Cool. We meet and I pretty much convinced this guy that they had to have me! I started the next day. So, those of you that know my legal issues. They have a company in America and I will work under that company name. I work from 2:30 until 8 or 8:30pm b/c I am only making calls to USA. NYC does not really get going until 9am. At least the designers don't wake up until then. I am straight commission so if I don't make some cash this month I am USA bound. There is no motivation like your as@ to the fire! I am a machine on the phone. I wish I could give you all the scoop but don't want to jinx my situation which is dire now.

Will post more later as am waiting to go out with Fufi! Should make for a good blog next week.

Life's a Beach in Paris!!!!!

Just wanted to give you a taste of the beach here. It is not the same as Chicago's beach but it is definitely "the scene". I have been twice now and really enjoy the people watching. It is only from July 20-Aug 20th.

It's F*%^$# HOT here!!!!

July 24

Things I miss in order of importance:

AIR CONDITIONING!!!!!!!!!!!

Things I need in order of importance:

JOB

Okay, now that we have the necessities covered let us move on shall we? I won't go into an entire blog about how much sweating is going on here but will just touch on the subject. I feel it is my duty to let you guys know what you are missing here in our fair country of France. As you regular readers know I live on the top floor of an apartment in Paris with big windows (aka nice breeze/good view). BUT, when it is 96 degrees or between 30-40 celcius the breeze does not matter b/c it is also HOT! I have bought a fan but in above said circumstances I don't know if it makes a difference to circulate said air or not. My windows and shutters are closed so no breeze no view. I almost feel like a roach living in a shoebox, with a very large unhappy cat. So, due to this heat here is what I must do in order to stay alive. I take about 3 cold showers a day. If I have to be at my apartment for longer than 20 minutes I have a washcloth that I load with ice and periodically move from face to neck, legs, arms etc. This keeps me from melting or passing out. The benefit from this weather is weight loss!!!!! It is too hot to cook, and you are so hot you lose your appetite. So, if this keeps up I will look like Nicole Ritchie (aka "the Splinter") in no time! Not that I want to look like a bobblehead with Jackie O sunglasses but it gives you a good visual, right? Also, it is apparently the norm amoung the younger internet hipsters like myself to not sleep when it is this hot. I discovered this 2 weeks ago when it was super hot and could not sleep and jumped on the net. Everyone in French cyberland is up! I have had some really random and interesting late night chats with other frenchies and italians at 2am, 3am. I had a french english exchange at 1am last Wednesday night? Okay, lets not talk about the weather anymore!

Next, Paris Plage! The beach has arrived! Coming from Chicago where we have a real beach is nice. But, in Paris we have the Seine, sans sand, volleyball etc. So, what do the french do but bring one into the city! July 20th is the opening day through August 20th. They haul in tons of sand along the Seine, a pool, cafes, games for kids, bands, decks with beach loungers, sand area with loungers, misters, sprinklers etc. Last Friday I decided if I am going to sweat my AS* off I will at least get a tan while doing it. I get my new tiny red striped french bikini, towel, book, ipod and water and head to the beach. I stroll the entire 3 km to scope out a good spot. I pick an area in the sandy beach section next to a single looking young guy. I get settled put on the ipod and I am happy! After an hour and a half I am melting and need the douche. (it is french for soak) I find some mister section where I walk along a deck that is a garden with misters? Only in France do they make an area of misters the prettiest thing I have ever seen! I decide to find a new spot sans sand so I can grab a lounge chair. I am walking along and find one open on the end next to 3 guys and a girl. I grab the chair and the guy says to me in French it is 10 euros for an hour! I say no way and keep unloading my bag knowing it is not so, then he says it is 3 euros for an hour I say no. His friends start to laugh and I know he is full of Merde! They are from Marsailles (not a good part of France) and are in Paris on holiday. Immediately we exchange introductions and they speak almost no english. None are cute and they are hitting on me big time. We chat for a bit and I decide I need douche again. I get up and gross teeth guy next to me taps me on my stomach and says in french you don't run? Assho$%! I said no! It is a wonder why women have such a complex. This guy is beyond nasty and he is pointing out my one flaw (work with me here :) After douche, I get out an apple for some sustenance. Nasty do you run man is asking for a bite??? YUK! He has super nasty teeth and I don't want to exchange any spit with him! I pretend I don't understand and then he grabs the apple from my hand and attempts to bite into it. He immediately flinches and gives it back and his teeth are covered in blood! Can you say lethal gingivitis? Gross! I start to cough because I think I will get sick right there. He tells me his teeth are malade (sick) really? No? So, here is the good comeback I could not say in French to his Do you run comment...No, do you go to the dentist???? You should!!!!!!! After an hour of literally fighting off nasty teeth guy and not giving my number to the other who when I turned over slapped me on my as*! I decided I was getting more wrinkles and annoyed than having fun. Just another day at the beach!

After the beach I went home to take a quick shower. (#2) I had to take my college transcripts to the translator to get them translated into french for my work visa. Not that I have a job but we are still in talks and I am doing all the paperwork as not to lose anytime with french red tape. I am rushing to her office and her smelly toy dog is on the floor in the waiting room which is 90 degrees and making my #2 shower pointless. After two people ahead of me and two phone calls it is my turn. We have to go over my college courses one by one to come up with a way to state it in french that makes sense. It has been awhile since I have been in college and I found some of the courses I took I can't even describe in English! That being said they will be ready to pick up this Friday. Hopefully, it will be worth the 160 euros I had to pay to have it done!

It is Friday night and our friend AJ is back in town. He got into town on Wednesday but got a text from him Tuesday night as he was getting on the plane. He tells me also that the guy who hooked us up will be in town this weekend. This is getting interesting. So, he calls Thursday night to tell me he is changing hotels to the city and will call me Friday after 6pm. Okay. Get text he invites me to dinner with our mutual connection friend. We have reservations at 9:30 at L'Atelier very famous restaurant by renowned chef Joel Robuchon. AJ and I get take metro together to meet friend (we will call Macfly). The restaurant is by far the nicest I have been to in Paris and I think AJ better be picking up the tab or I will be going home sooner than expected! Macfly is there and says we are waiting for another girl to meet us. Okay? He said it is a friend and her name is Foufi (nicknamed by Macfly). She arrives and looks like a model. Think Jessica Simpson but taller, skinner and more angelic with less make-up. Wow! She is Brazilian and speaks 5 languages. hate her! Macfly speaks at least 5 also so they start in French and I am following along. I look at AJ who looks bored out of his mind and ask if he understands ...no. So, my french is better than maybe 4 other people here. Macfly overhears and says oh, shall we speak in Spanish? (AJ being from Central America spanish is his mother tongue) I say no! Let's speak in English because we all understand that! That suggestion lasted about 5 minutes and it was back to french again. Fine. Dinner was amazing, wine was divine! Grappa for disgestif! A little drunk. Macfly picks up the whole tab! YEAH! AJ says I guess I will pick up all the drinks this evening. Cool. We agree to hit the nightclub scene at the end of dinner. We go to Doobies a popular spot in the 8th. Foufi and I are getting along well and bonding abit. Once we get into the club the guys go to the bar and Foufi and I are on the dance floor. After one drink we are dancing fools and the guys are nearby but not involved in our girl dance party. Foufi is grinding me from every direction and we start to gain some attention from other men onlookers. Macfly gets a little jealous and tries to cut in but it does not last and Foufi is having no part of it. She starts to grab me a bit and is getting very intimate with me? I get the feeling Foufi likes me more than I think! After another 30 minutes I think Macfly is jealous and wants to hit another club. So, we leave and it is raining. Foufi, AJ and I hide under an awning and Macfly does taxi duty. After standing under awning I decide it is crucial decision time. AJ wants to bail he is tired. I think I must go now in order to not get into further trouble. Cab comes I bail Foufi begs, looks like she will cry if I don't come. I am not a lesbian or bi-sexual (yet) but I am flattered to know if I chose I could land a hot model babe like her! Touche!

More Alumni and myspace connections...

Saturday July 8th

I've discovered getting into a good MBA program is hard but hanging out with the alums post grad is much easier. So, yet another alum has emailed me to tell me he has an alumni friend that is in town for business and is expecting my call. I love when this happens. I call this guy we will call AJ and we have a nice convo and decide to meet for drinks. By the way, his name gives him away but he of unknown latin decent with accent. tres sexy!

I have also made friends with a girl from CA that is in town to visit and we had met today for a drink and is coming over for dinner. Met her on myspace.

I come home with the fixins' for frenchy din din. I get said call from AJ. He asks me if I have plans for dinner? WOW, nice gesture what if I look like a monster and have the manners of a barn yard animal? I nicely decline and tell him I am cooking. He says have dinner for breakfast? I like the direction he is going but can't take him up on it. I decline again tell him I have a guest coming. We agree to meet for a drink at his hotel which is off the Champs Elysees. I get cute and prep dinner and leave. I am walking/running down Champs to get there ontime and call him. Where is the Radisson??? I was on agreed corner, so I thought, and he was too. After much negiotiating we discover I am on Marbeuf he is on Marceau. MERDE! It was my misunderstanding but now I have to run back towards my apartment. We meet and he is very well dressed, sexy latin man who smells wonderful. Big perk on the scent since french dudes stink! We walk and talk and go to bar right near corner of my apartment. His hotel is around the corner from me. V. convienent. We have great convo and good drinks. I ask him what he is doing tonight. He has no plans so I ask him if he would like to join myspace girl and I. Sure! Myspace and I have dinner and after get call from AJ. We meet at same place for drinks and chat. We decide to go clubbing for the night. On to the Champs Elysees we go again. We hit club six seven and the games begin. The drinks are bought we chat a bit and it looks that AJ is not dancing. Okay, myspace and I hit the dance floor and leave him alone. We come back for periodic check ups and he is just hanging out. Fast forward two hours. I am getting hit on alot by foreign young guys bad english or no english. Myspace and I have been separated while I am a dancing flirting fool! I come back to the bar and they are gone. MERDE. I am looking and hotty turkish guy approaches. I tell him let's go outside for fresh air and drinks and we can chat. This guy is really cute from what I remember but once outside I realize whatever french I know has been used up and he speaks no English. Not good. We are struggling to keep whatever chemistry there was going but it is gone. My phone rings and it is AJ. He said they lost me and he walked myspace to a cab and is walking home. Oh, okay. He asks how I am and I tell him I am struggling with Turkish hottie. He asks if I would like him to come back and I say of course. He comes back within minutes and sits next to me. Turkey is looking confused and I explain in horrible french he is friends of my bro etc. Turkey is not getting it and now AJ is talking to two chicks. After exhaustion on lingusitics chicks leave and I tell Turkey good-bye and leave with AJ. He asks if I still want to go out and i say why not? We walk to other nearby club Madame. Much less crowded still hotter than hades. We get more drinks and dance the night away. After too many vodkas and lots of sweat we call it a night. to be continued...

Bals des Pompiers/ Fireman's Ball!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

July 13th





I love the Pompiers!!!! Okay this is how it went down. Alumni french guy calls to see if I would like to meet him and friends out tonight. Okay, then get call from AJ who is still in Paris? He wants to go out. I tell him I am meeting other alum who he knows and we agree to meet at 10:30 at the end of my street. I am looking cute standing on my corner waiting for AJ. And a car stops and two guys lean out window and say "how much?" WHAT?!?!? Yes, they think I am a hooker! I don't know how to say hooker in french (I did not think it would come in handy but will definitely try to learn it) but try to explain in french that I am not a hooker. They look confused that I am sending them away. Although, I really need the money but not that bad! They finally drive off looking puzzled and I call AJ ...911 where are you???? No answer. Another car, not kidding, same scenerio. For those of you that know me I don't dress all that sexy. I had on a white halter blouse (cute not slutty) and black pants normal sandals not F-me shoes. I keep walking and try to ignore the "how much" cat calls and keep dialing AJ. He answers and I see him so relieved to be saved. I tell him the story and he looks like he doesn't believe me. Whatever! I would not lie about such a charming story! We jump on the train to St. Germain to meet other frenchy alum. We are walking towards area I am on the phone with frenchy and he says you will see a huge line and walk past it. Why...do I have to stand in said line or what is the deal? He just says call me when you get close to the front and will find each other. Okay? AJ and I are on the corner and I spot very tall, skinny guy (Gay alum and friends!!!) I run up to him and he is also meeting frenchy alum. We all walk to meet frenchy and he is near the front. I ask him what the F^%&^%^* is going on here? I can hear music blaring is Madonna in concert??? He says no it is the Bals des Pompiers!! What is that? The Fireman's Ball. Oh cool. Note, previous post we like the pompiers and get rides from the Chief! We get in and it looks like animal house but international and bars serving Champagne. Needless to say it was tons of fun. The Pompiers ended up putting on a show and stripped!!! I don't have those pics yet but will post them as soon as I get them. I LOVE PARIS!

Job status...

Still no job but hope is on the horizon. The composites company is still in the running or I am still in the running I should say. We are still talking and future would be boss is starting my paperwork for my work visa. I am trying to not get hopeful b/c he has plainly told me he has not chosen me but he has not made his decision.

A little tidbit on the jobby job. It is international sales based in Paris. My territory would cover China, India, Austrailia, North America, England and New Zealand. I would travel quite a bit which is cool. If I get this job I would be coming back to the states for a show in St. Louis in October. It is a great opportunity (I think) and could provide me with that Je ne sais quoi I have been in search of on the job front.

By the way, the babysitting thing fell through. The mommy decided that she doesn't need me to start until September. Nice but need money now....

Free ride with the Chef???

Some Saturday night towards the end of June???

We are dating back about 3 weeks now...

RG invited me to a company party on a boat on the Seine. Cool! We decide to meet at her flat for pre-party drinks. We drink a bottle of vino, strawberries and chocolate before we go. Like all pre-parties in Paris they are upscale ways to save money!!! We get on Metro and get on this huge party boat next to Assembly Nationale and near Place de la Concorde. The boat is filled with people drinking mingling, and there is a dance club downstairs. RG introduces me to all of her co-workers who are very young. We get drinks and mingle amoung the crowd. We decide it is a bit young and we should make the best of it and dance downstairs. The music is good and we have our own girl dance party going. As the hours pass it gets more and more crowded (more early 20 somethings). I am getting hit on by a cute guy that tells me he is 20 and doesn't care that I am 30-something!!! I bet he doesn't but unfortunately I do! If he is not Ashton Kutcher I ain't buying what he is selling. He kept pestering me and then proceeded to follow me into the girls bathroom. Of course, in france this is no big deal. No women look at him twice. I get into a stall and peel off my sweaty jeans to do my perfected hover. I get out of the stall to be relieved on two levels. I have peed successfully with toilet paper and 20-something is making out with other chick in front of me. Cool. I do the quick wash up as to not disturb the happy couple and dash outta there. I find RG and we continue dance party for a bit then decide to go back upstairs for fresh air. Remember fellow readers, france has no a/c in the important places (aka clubs? bars etc) We mingle a bit go back downstairs and repeat a few times. The last time to go to top we walk to the front of the boat and who is there but my 20-something. He asks for my number and is surprised when I say no? I was not going to say anything about the make-out b/c in France they don't care. I looked at RG and said I think it is time to go. We successfully bail and walk to hotel Crillion for a taxi. RG is much more into her drink than myself so I nicely let her take the first cab. Mistake #99. I immediately get surrounded by Arab men offering to take me home. I negiotiate with one and walk towards his cab. He has no light on top and an unmarked car. RED FLAG. I ask why he says he is a private cab. HMMMM???? Okay, I ask a few more questions and it is not too convincing. Luckily, Hotel Crillion is next to the American Embassy which is guarded by the Gendarmes 24 hours a day. I say let's take you over to the Gendarmes (cops) and ask if you are legit if they say okay then I will get into your cab. He says no, no no. I immediately tell him no thanks and then they all say we will drive you home for free! No way! I scurry off to the Gendarme and ask where else I can find a ride he says in french it's too late to get a cab. Whatever dude you suck this is paris and it is never too late for anything. I walk away and start my trek home on foot. I get to the Grand Palais and it is being guarded by the Pompiers (firemen, who are much hotter then the gendarme) There are two men on the corner one in uniform and one not but has fancy belt, gun and CB. I approach them and ask where I can get a cab they say there are none it is too late. I explain that they are sorely mistaken as I have had many late nights in Paris and have gotten cabs so they need to come up with a better answer. We go back and forth a bit and explain I am not walking home by myself at 3:30 am. The man in the street clothes gives me a "un moment si l'vous plait" and runs back to the Gr Palais. He negiotiates with some other Pompiers and calls me over. He tells me to follow him to the side door of the Grand Palais and knocks on the door where there are about 5 security guards. They let him in and he has some quick exchange and comes back out. He says he will give me a ride home. What? I question him in front of his hommies and ask why he doesn't have the cool uniform on? He says b/c I am the Chef! I know this is french but I immediately go into dumb blonde mode and say what? You are the cook??? After instant explosion of laughter from his hommies in uniform I understand my translation error. He is the Chief of the Fire department! I love when I am so clueless...not really. After I get over embarrassment and apologize I realize how pimpy this is! We get into his little car (something small and frenchy) and as he starts the engine the music blares. Seniorita by Justin Timberlake!!! God I love this guy! Side note, he is about 27 and really cute, hot lean bod. We sing together on the way down the Champs Elysees and I yell directions in between in French. He takes me home, I think about asking for his number but decide calling him the cook was enough embarrassment for the night and I have no skills. I thank him and make it home safe and sound at 4:30am. Another successful night in Paris!

Will, his partner & Grace???

Old news: World cup...done. Sad but true, I am a little pleased with the outcome as I may have been trampled or hit by a french flag of joy on my way home.

Last weekend or week before in June?

Very old news Catch up from past weekends: Called one of my bro's alums that is french and lives in Paris. Phone proved to be very fruitful. He gave me a list of names of people to call for networking. Cool. I called and got two responses right away. Not bad.

Meeting #1 with guy from above call: He is a fellow alumnae and I assume single? Never assume. We single gals never learn. So, he calls and asks me to meet him near Jardin de Luxembourg on Saturday afternoon and then to lunch. Cool. We have very nice conversation so the wheels are already turning. He describes himself so we can find each other. He says he is a very tall, skinny, dark blonde spikey haired, blue eyes. Okay? Don't know what to expect so prepare for possible rendez-vous avec Monsieur Right! Get out of metro and wait anxiously for Prince Charming? There is a guy leaning against the fence about 6'4" thin, blonde etc. He is cute. YEAH! I approach and it is him. We walk and talk and are getting along quite well. Quickie background on him: American, went to grad school, now getting his doctorate at Sciences Po (the Harvard of France) and speaks fluent French...sexy! So, we are sitting outside chatting and I am sweating like a pig in my super I am not trying to look cute but I do outfit. Sidenote: I am a bit hungover from last night with RG on boat. See previous post. We continue to chat and he gets a phone call from friend he calls Stelli. He tells me that he is meeting us for lunch. Okay, the more the merrier if things don't work out plan B has arrived, right? We go to lunch at this adorable cafe in the 5th and chat. He is very helpful and full of suggestions for me on apartments, jobs, networking etc. I ask him about his doctorate and it is so complicated and boring that I won't bother. So, Stelli calls again to tell him he is on the way. I ask after he hangs up so how do you know Stelli? Response: He is my partner. See Kendall's anxious eyes and face try not to show disappointment and surprise. I knew I was obvious. Merde! Pause, so that's cool how did you meet???? The rest of the story is not as exciting but again insert foot etc. Note on Stelli, he is Greek, tan, beatiful eyes, great bod, also getting his PHd yada, yada, yada and still...gay. I am so happy for them...kinda. I did get an invite to their dinner party? Okay why not ... next blog

Adventures in Babysitting!!!! and what are Soldes?

July 5th

Happy belated 4th? Not important here, we are all consumed in World Cup preparations for tonight and Sunday. Next week will be Bastille Day so who says the French don't work hard??? I don't think any French have worked since the first day they played. I can't wait to get a job and start "working" in France. I don't know what I will do with 6 weeks vacation???

So, for those of you that are as pre-school french as me "soldes" are sales!!! Translation: Everything in Paris is supposedly 50% off. Guess things have changed because some stuff is 20%,30% etc. Anyway, like I told my mom, this is like putting a crack addict in a crack house and telling them hey, no smoking crack, okay?!!! I have been shopping almost everyday with my girlfriend and have not bought a thing. Do you hear that MOM and DAD...nothing. I have tried on Gian Franco Ferre tops, Manolo Blanik shoes, Ballenciaga Bags are you following me? But, even at 50% off it is so F(*&()* in' expensive. Some of the bags are $3000 euros = $3800 dollars half off? Who cares? Almost $2000 for a purse? There better be my future husband inside of it and he better be hot and really rich!!! Among other things!!!

Next, did that title say babysitting? Yes, my friends out there in cyberland. I had an interview for a babysitter a few days ago. The little boy, we'll call him baby c or c for short actually liked me? I went to meet the mom and c and we had a chat at her ultra fab apartment. Baby c was so cute (20 mos old) and kept flirting with me and playing. Who knew? So, mom gave me the thumbs up and I might start on Thursday. It is only part time but it is cash and I'll take it! Why can't baby c be 30-something, well educated, rich, like short blondes with no french skills, living in Paris, and willing to support above mentioned "crack habit"? I am not picky right? Well, I guess he is rich, likes me and lives in Paris! I am picky aren't I? Sorry for the psycho-analysis intermission.

Love life update or lack there of...

For those of you that I don't talk to regularly and are only reading the blog here is the love life update.

Previous blogs I spoke of Stephan. He has been released due to falling too hard. He called too much and missed me too much. I know most of you think I am pretty fabulous but anyone who falls that hard that fast? I am not that fabulous. I almost kept him around due to his cooking skills but just could not deal.

Then I met a cute guy at a salsa club a two weeks ago. He had very nice teeth (think Gene Kelly if he was young and living!) He was the best salsa dancer ever. You know all girls fall for that dancing thing. We agreed to do something the following day. Normally, men don't follow through. But, girls we are in France and these dudes are like puppies. They always call, in fact, they call too much. Hence previous reference to Stephan. This guy Alli? calls and wants to meet me in Le Marais. It was okay since I was working at the gallery. We go for a drink at some really cute cafe near the Seine. Already I was thinking this is a mistake. He is way overly positive for me. And tells me I have a lucky star? What?! Do you think that lucky star could score me a job soon? Anyway, we go to dinner and he is nice but it is so not happening for me. We end up getting a drink near my place at some cool bar (will go there again sans Alli). He is very affectionate and it is annoying so I tell him I am not interested and I would like to go home. He walks me home and tells me he still would like to go out. NO! That was the end of that. Nothing else exciting. The french men better improve here or we are going to have some problems.

F.R.I.E.N.D.S. (insert cheesy intro song here)

June 2 ??? It is Monday ( I do know that) June 26th!

You tend to forget the actual dates when you have been out of work for as long as I have. I just had to check on old blogs to make sure I am not repeating myself and this little bugger gives you the date when you save as draft. Why did I have to go to college? The internet provides you with all the tools you need to survive in this crazy world!!!

Okay, I promised good news on the social scene. I wish I could get paid for this b/c my success rate is 10 fold over the job hunt. So, let's go back to day two working at boring gallery in Le Marais. I get a random email from a girl asking me if I am the one that went to Pearce high school and am I in Paris?

me: yes and yes
her: graduated a year earlier, was neighbors with two other chicks we went to high school with, what are you doing here?
me: moved here on a whim 3 months ago, looking for work and you???
her: (long story abbreviated) was in NYC, met french dude, got married, moved to Paris and also looking for work.
me: let's get together for a coffee or drink and talk about our lack of jobs!!!
her: okay!

I think we have another candidate in the friend department! We meet for lunch the following Tuesday. It was tons of fun gossiping about old high school people. We end up drinking enough wine to forget our worries of having no job. Girl bonding was at it's highest levels!

So, after many hours of talk and catch up from over 10 years new friends husband calls to see where the hell she is? What it is 7pm??? Oops, I hate/love when you go to lunch and drink til dinner! It happens sometimes...

I forgot! On Monday (day before lunch) I went to a picnic organized by meetup.com. My other friend from church was supposed to attend but had to back out last minute to show an apt. So, I have to go alone. It is at Pont des Arts bridge and I get "the usual". 2 Baguettes, 2 kinds of smelly cheese, 1 bottle wine, 1 batch/box of cherries. Off I go! I arrive and know no one and choose to sit on the end as everyone seems to be long time friends and are laughing and a few bottles of wine into the evening. I am welcomed by two french girls?! Okay, did not explain the irony here. I am at an American meetup picnic. So, I ask the now dumb question "Why are you guys in the American group?" response: "To improve our Ingleesh!" AH hA! DUH! After some conversation and pleasantries a girl I know is walking towards us. I met her at a previous event a few months ago. She is Russian and really nice. To spare her identity we will call her RG for Russian girl. Got it? RG recognizes me (thank god) and sits next to me. She is nice and we start to chat. I feel another friendship on the horizon. We continue to talk until picnic is slowly breaking up. She asks if I would like to join her and some friends to continue the festivities on a boat on the Seine? OKAY! We head to the other side of the bridge and down the stairs to this house boat on the Seine. VERY COOL! There is a large teak table on the top deck with 6 chairs and flowers and topiary? trees. We greet (aka kiss) random guy on boat (owner maybe) and bring the rest of our wine and some beer. RG and I go to the bathroom and checkout the digs underneath. The living area is about 4 times the size of my apt. Doesn't say much I know but it is beautiful. We continue to socialize about an hour more then call it a night. RG and I exchange numbers and decide we should go out sometime. Cool! By the way, RG speaks fluent french, which will come in handy at a later blog...

Update job status - French 3 Kendall 0

June 22nd

So, to keep all of you updated on my lack of job status here goes:

A few blogs ago I told you about an interview in Montrouge. Well, that guy blew me off. He just never returned my phone calls so I assume the getting the work visa thing was just a little too much for him. Moving right along. So, then I had another interview with a company about 2 weeks ago. It is for another sales position selling subscriptions to an online pharmaceutical news wire. As usual the interview went well ( I think) and here it is 2 weeks later....nothing. I called him on Monday of this week and left a vm. To which I got no call back. Today I sent him an email. I will assume he will not respond. I don't mind rejection so can these pussy french please at least get some nuts and just tell me NO? I got another call today for an interview for later this afternoon. It is sales for a composites magazine. The good thing about this company is it is really close to my way too expensive apartment. I will keep you posted on the status of this. I am hoping 3 times will be the charm??? I have not worked at the gallery again so no dice there.

that is the bad news...

good news update on the social scene to follow!

Got work???

June 14th

Well I am working right now. Amazing, huh, they let you update your blog at work! I am working at a gallery in Le Marais. Not very busy here. I am filling in for a friend that works here part time. I'll take it! I work today and tomorrow. I will be on the list as a sub when my friend can't or doesn't want to work. So, tonight I am meeting my french friend tonight for Salsa dancing. It should be fun.

June 13th

Jr. League on Steroids....

So, my new friend that I met at church invited me to a tea at the Residence of the American Ambassdor to France. Okay?! It was yesterday afternoon and a beautiful day in Paris. I show up looking as cute as possible. And am escorted in by the Gendarmes (french police) This place is gorgeous! I wish I could have taken pictures. It is the most beautiful mansion I have ever been in. I was seated near the back and listened to a boring speach by a really old lady. Then spotted my friend who saved a seat at the front for me. We sat in a room with french doors 3 sides of the room which were open to their gardens that looked like a movie. Then in came the trio of women that sang and a floutist? and guitar player played some pieces that were a mix of Tango and Classical. It was beautiful. I felt like I was at the white house in Paris... ou est Laura Bush??? :) My friend said that the x-wife of one the french presidents was there and we should make an excuse to go and meet her. Okay why not? So, we went up to her (Madame Valery Giscard d'Estaing) and told her we would like to volunteer with her organization (which I didn't even know she had one) Something to do with children. Anyway, she said she only takes professional volunteers. I guess JLC did not qualify me for French volunteering. DAMN! She said she could use us to stuff envelopes. And to think I used to pray for that job at JLC now I don't want it b/c I need to meet people. Anyway, she was pretty nice and spoke perfect english. After the trio and french ass kissing we were off to have tea in the other room. Can you say the nicest spread ever? Much better than any wedding reception I have ever been to. The finger foods and pastries all looked like flowers. Almost too good to eat but I indulged. We met some more very nice people mostly wearing designer clothes that I have been drooling over in the windows! Who are these people? Anyway, we decided to tour the premises b/c the art work is famous here. By the way, this residence is formerly owned by the Rothschilds. Does that give you a hint to what we are dealing with here? The art work and detailing of the walls, ceiling, etc was like a museum. After the tour was over we were outta there, they had another group coming in for some other cause. I think I was there for some children's charity. So, we left and ran errands for hours all over paris and finished the day with a cold glass of Brouilly (very good chilled red wine) at Cafe de Flore in St. Germaine and watched the world go by. Not a bad day!

I have to pee!!!!!!!!!!!

Mom had to go. At least the public toilets are clean. This is in Le Marais (my old hood).

View from the top!

This is a view from one of my windows! Here is Mr. Big in Paris he loves it here.

Picture this, parents visit!

June 9th

Hey all! My parents were here and we had so much fun. I am including pics so you can see. My dad got to celebrate his b-day in Paris with us and our french friends. It was so great and the cake rocked! Chocolate cake with chocolate mousse, crunchy chocolate crust swimming in rasberry coulis! YUMMY!

This is a pic of my mom and I in my tiny french apt! This was their first day so they were very tired.

Houston we have lift off!!

May 29th

Hey kids! Good news I finally have the internet at home! The biggest french accomplishment other than the bank of course. Doesn't seem like such a big deal you think? Well, I just spent an hour this morning downloading this bad boy in all french. I must say my french must be improving b/c not only is it working but my computer has not blown up! So, since we have last updated my parents were here visiting last week. We had so much fun. I had to take two days to recover from the record amount of full tourist guide, good daughter trying to get job activites. Oh, before I forget I had a really good job interview week before last? I can't remember now. Anyway, it is in Montrouge which is on the edge of Paris at the end of line 13 on the Metro. Not that means anything to you guys but it is an easy commute. Only 45 mins door to door. It is an internet start up company that connects/matches bulk cell phone buyers and sellers. The president is very nice french of course and speaks good/decent english. I would be selling primarily to Western Europe (in english of course). The interview went very well until I dropped the whole I am not legal to work in this country bomb. He took it well but had no idea what to do to get a visa for me. So, he called me as I was walking to my apartment and asked me to do the legwork and send him the info so he can forward it to his accountant. Okay! I sent him a barrage of information off the French consulate website and now am sitting on my hands hoping he does not throw in the towel due to the amount of paperwork he will have to do to get it done. Will keep everyone posted if this actually happens...

Insert new Title here: Kendall went to church!
I tried to cut and paste this one but I can't do it on this blog so you guys are getting a long one.

Oh, so much to catch up on! I also (everyone hold their breath) went to church a few Sundays ago. I know, it is sacreligious of me to be there but I went anyway in search of friends etc. Believe or not the church did allow me inside and it was a really nice service. It is the American Church in Paris and it is beautiful. I ended up going to a meeting afterward the church held for an update on a new french proposition on expats trying to get the illusive carte de sejour (legal residence card). Not good news for me but won't go into the dirty details for you guys just more french red tape. But, I did sit next to a really nice girl who spoke fluent french and is from New York. She and I talked and exchanged numbers. Yeah, friend number 2! I am really making headway huh? I called her the following week...no response. 2-1=1. Am I back to 1 already??? So, not ready to give up still, I go to the American Cathedral in Paris 2 weeks later. Guess who is an usher??? My new don't return my phone call friend! I am going to get her to like me now! I wait until service is over and stand at the back of the church hoping I will see her. No? Then decide to go to coffee hour/social in the back of the church. I look cool standing around bymyself while everyone exchanges kisses in french and english. Okay, decide I am not strong enough to stand alone and wait so I go to put coffee cup on table and a woman introduces herself to me. Thank you!!! She is very nice and wearing a tag that says "welcoming committee". God, I feel so stupid. She has two kids in tow running around her skirt and screaming which makes the conversation limited at best. Eventually, we run out of conversation and she has to chase the kids so I let her go. Okay, now I am leaving. As I turn to walk out here comes my soon to be new friend that must have forgotten to return my call. Her name is Christine and walked right up to her and she recognized me right away. Yeah! We chatted and she apologized for the not returned phone call which I have totally forgiven her for now. She asked me if I had anything to do later (what do you mean of course not! I only have one friend and a pseudo french boyfriend my schedule is wide open!) and if i would go to a flea market with her. Heck yeah!

French cooking school avec Stephan

May 16

Okay, more scoop on Stephan. He is the manager of very posh hot restaurant/nightclub on Champs Elysees. He also went to french cooking school. Big brownie points. After successful bank day he volunteers to cook for me. We go to the Monoprix (french Target) but gourmet food too. We buy tons of food and head back to my apartment. He starts cooking about 4pm and insists that I watch and write down what he is doing. No problem! I open a bottle of my new favorite wine called Sancerre. It is white and very good wine for summer. Sancerre is a small town/vineyard just 60miles south of Paris. They make some good stuff. I set up at my bar with wine in one hand and pen in the other. He is cooking/ chopping and explaining in french and I am guessing what the ingredients are in English. Thank you mom for not just making me mac and cheese and bologne sandwiches. I am looking at spices and smelling and saying oh that's dill, and cumin etc. We argue a bit about word for pot. Can't remember french word b/c still not sure if it is skillet or pot. Anyway, he makes me a starter of crawfish salad with avocado, tomatoes garlic onion etc. He chops it all up into perfect squares and then neatly places back inside avocado shell and proceeds to make a lemon swan out of the rind. Oh how I love the french details! It was the best salad I have ever had! Then we moved onto the main course. Chicken with lemon and olives. It was awesome and I made it a week later for myself and it was delicious. If I stay with Stephan I can open up my own restaurant in the states when I return (if I return???)

Denied and 3 days later she was resurrected!!!

May 16th

Hi all! So much has happened. Where do I start? Well, got denied by HSBC. F the French banks! Of course, I asked why, response " in france we don't have to tell you why"...bastards! I got mad then thought, I can do this everything here takes at least three trys before you get anywhere. Another reason I was so pissed I got this news while I was sunning in the park/garden at the Eiffel Tower and it ruined my day. I am so spoiled! So, I had just gotten a call from my new friend James that I met at the meetup.com event to invite me to an art show in the 13th. I called him back and said count me in! We met on the metro and made the trek to the 13th which is quite a haul from my secluded 16th. It was set up inside of an old church and was beautiful setting. Most of the artists were American and one was from Chicago. None of it was my taste but it was a good experience and met some other members of the group. After a glass of wine and enough chat I got back on metro and stopped by Slim's bar for a glass of wine and friendly chatter and continued my trip back to the 16th.
So, my predicament now is how does one pay the rent (on time) with no french bank account? CASH! I pulled out my 800 euros and hopped on the bus to the 7th to the CIC bank for the agency I am renting from and asked them to take my money for rent. No! They are only a commercial bank but they referred me to another CIC location and so I got back on bus and went there. Of course, no one spoke english and after three tries in bad french they understood my predicament and took my money for rent. YEAH! I decided they knew I had money so I asked if I could get a bank account with them. Yes, but have to make an appointment. So, I made an appointment the following week with Benoit. I asked what artillery of information they would need for this one and they only asked for passport and apartment contract? Is it so??? I have been to probably 5 different banks in france and this one only needs two things. It is too good to be true. Appointment day arrives and meet with Benoit. All goes well and it seems he set up the account on the spot? I met with Stephan (his name has not been changed b/c he is not going to read this) and he translated my stack of french paperwork from bank and he confirmed I have an account! One more point for the American team! All I need now is to put money into said account.

My first french haircut - sans scissors and standing??

May 3

I forgot to put this in the blog earlier. I got my first french haircut. Quite intresting. I went to a place in La Marais (my old hood). I got a recommendation from Katie that her hairdresser speaks English. Yeah! Her name is Aude and she was so nice. So, she asked me what i wanted and I said cut it shorter and do whatever you want. She stood me up and used a razor. they do not used scissors and only cut (shave) when you are standing. It is the cutest haircut I have ever had! It is also very inexpensive. I got a haircut and intensive treatment for $58 american dollars! Would have been cheaper but dry hair needed some love. I wish i had pictures b/c of course I cannot do it like she did but it is still cute.
Also, met another French guy out on Saturday night with Katie. His name is Stephan. he and i went out on sunday. We met at a cafe near Opera for coffee, then beer, then the worst guacamole I have ever had and then left to go to his friends restaurant. it was moroccan and awesome! we had couscous, lamb ( I think), some other stuff that i don't know what it was but very good. We had a hookah and mint tea! Ended the night at a loungy night club on the Champs Elysees called Le Paris. Very cool very expensive!!! He paid thank god! 15 euros for a mojito!
Also, went to a meetup (expat group) at Alcazar in the 6th. That place was also very cool. It is in a book that I have of Paris' coolest bars/restaurants. It was the best mojito I have ever had and it was only 12 euros! YIKES! Met some really nice people. Will keep in touch with a few for some contacts and networking. I met a guy from Minnesota that has lived in Paris for over 20 years. he seems to be well connected so we exhanged information and will be going to some other events he told me about.
Guess what? I went to church last sunday at the American church in Paris! I met a very nice girl from NY and hopefully will see her again soon.
I also had my first french/english exchange. I met a french girl Isabelle that is looking to perfect her already very good english. She is very nice and we spent two hours talking to me like I am 3 yrs old and then i just talked to her about regular stuff since she is quite fluent but was still a good experience. It is also free so that is a big perk!
Went to HSBC today for the french bank account and actually have some hope I might get a carte bleue! It is the french ATM/visa card that is used everywhere and no fees! I am getting very close to being somewhat legitimate here. who knew????

A picture finally!

April 27th

Hey all! My first pictures! Okay, girl on the left is Katie and me in middle and another American girl on right named Ann. This picture was taken at 4ish am and we were well into the champagne. Needless to say, I had a champagne hangover before I even left the party. It was a 40th birthday party of a girl that lives in the 7th with a balcony view of the Eiffel tower! It was incredible! Anyway, she is a sort of clothes designer etc and made us try on these barets she made and wanted to take our picture. I thought it was cute. There is another one that I have not gotten yet when we are all wearing wigs! It is quite funny. Anyway, model/scout guy is out. Now, Lauren, again has come through with yet another meeting with an American guy that has lived in Paris for 2 years. We are meeting tonight for drinks. Will keep you posted on that. My meeting ended up being yesterday evening (it got delayed a week due to his schedule). It was not very positive but he promised to set up some appointments for me and I am to follow up with him next week. I will let you guys know if anything happens. Mr. Big has officially made friends with my neighbors. He crawls out of my windows everyday and scratches on thiers. My neighbors are very young french guy or guys not really sure how many live there. There seems to be a lot of late night activity and none during the day. Anyway, they don't speak much english but don't mind Big coming over for visits. I had to go over there last weekend and fetch him as I was leaving to go out and he would not come back! So, at least one of us is making male friends (although, Big is a boy so I guess that would make him gay or just very french!) Nothing else too exciting here.

fashion note: converse are all the rage here and puma's are still very popular. Flats are also big with fishnets and all kinds of fun crazy tights/hose.

Easter in Paris - very boring!

April 18th

still no internet at the new pad. But finally have some time to just sit at of all places McDonalds to jump on their free wifi. Which in french is pronounced "wee-fee". Gay? It is next door to my favorite pannini stand where I will be going after this blog. Have big sort of meeting tomorrow with "big wig" in Paris. We'll see if he needs some american that does not speak french to assist him with anything. Katie and I have been spending most of our weekends together going to dinner at inexpensive little french cafes and going to the same bars since we now know all the owners and they give us free drinks! Thanks Slim. Katie claims my french is improving but I still can't even speak in full sentences most of the time. I am understanding alot more conversation on the metro and overhearing more conversation that I can pick up. Some progress, I guess. Anyway, I am having no luck on the french boy hunt. I have been out with a french guy that is a model/scout of all things! he and I met through of course Lauren's crazy connections. He and I went out twice last week but all he talked about was himself and how much his models love him. Who cares? he also admitted that his mother still does his laundry which was a huge red flag. he said all of my past girlfriends have taken over that duty when we were together and I said well that would not be possible with me unless you paid me to do it!!! Loser. I have also been to a french birthday party in the suburbs. That was interesting. Of course, friend of katie's and only one person at the party spoke english. it was almost unbearable. French are strange, since this is my first party that I have not participated in I spend the night watching the interactions. they don't talk to each other unless they are already friends. they make no effort to get to know anyone else new? what is that all about. Who want to have the same group of friends for the rest of your life? The food was incredible though so I spent some time trying things I did not recognize. The one guy that spoke english was very nice and we spent about 2 hours talking. Not cute but very nice. If you haven't heard the protests are over. the fairy french government caved! What a bunch of wussy's. Not all of you may like Bush but at least he stands his ground. Villepin is really sexy but apparently a slave to the poles. Although, I think the damage has been done. He is out for President the french hate him (he is too conservative) Imagine that??? Next protest that is upcoming I predict will be the car fires in the suburbs again. It has been awhile and that was never really resolved. I am getting some hummings on the news that the poor immigrants in the Banlieus (suburbs/projects) are getting their feathers ruffled again. this past weekend was pretty much a drag. Paris was empty except for the tourists. Everything was closed so no shopping (even at the grocery store). that is about it for now. I have not had any major falls/flubs in french (that are really funny at least) recently.

Sowers...OUT!

Back in Business - sort of...

April 5th

WOW! Boy, you guys have missed alot. I just don't have the time or patience to write all of the stuff that happens to me on a daily basis. The internet connection at the last apt on rue des rosiers was awful. Anyway, I ended up getting the cute apt in the 16th on the 6th floor. So, I moved in last weekend and it was quite the work-out. I was supposed to get help from "french friend" but apparently not the top of his list. I moved by myself and it took 3 days up and down 115 steps to the metro back and forth! I hope I lose weight after that one. Still getting settled and used to the new quiet neighborhood. It is quite different and not as active but very safe.

Kristina and I did take a side trip to Bordeaux when she was here which was beautiful. Only stayed for 2 days but enjoyed the opportunity to get away and see something new.

still at rue des rosiers...
So, I have had a meeting with this guy we will call Teri. He is very nice and takes me to lunch at this cute place right by my apt and we are discussing my joblessness. He asks me quite a few questions on why I am in Paris etc. I give him my unrecited true answer and he says you should write that down it sounds good. Well, he takes my resume and says he will pass it on and send me an email with some names to call etc. It is not a job but some hope.

Next up get a call from the secretary of another French gentleman I am meeting with on April 19th. I google this fellow and find out he is one of the top CEO's in Paris! Now we are talking! It seems this guy is very close to Chirac so don't really know how I feel about that but will keep American mouth shut! I will work for anyone if they pay me, right?

I haven't been going out as much since all guests have since departed and Katie was in London for a week. I also had to move so no funny stories.

BUT...leave it to Lauren to hook me up! Rick has a friend at Kellogg who is french and obviously has lots of friends here. We chatted a bit via email and he referred me to his friend Vincent who I am meeting up with tonight. We are meeting at one of his friends apts for drinks at 10pm then to a club called Duplex? Should be interesting. He stressed to me twice about the dress code, little does he know who he is talking to! Hopefully, will make some new friends and some of better be french. I need to practice my lacking of french speaking skills!

Well, my battery is almost dead so i will try to write more tomorrow!!!

Update

April 3rd

Fast forward to now for now. Guys no access to internet in the new apt. No updates for a few days. Might try to hit some internet cafes but don't relish sitting there for 3 hours. Might try a few wireless cafes but have not had a lot of luck with those so far. The new apt is really cute though!!! I got the one in the 16th and it is 115 steps up to my place no elevator. Girls, buns of steel will not begin to define my new hot ass!!!

All is well in Paris! Protestors what???

Everything looks better in Pink and Green!

March 15th Wednesday

I am up early 7am can't sleep stressed about move. I am in shower and cleaning apt at 8am. Landlady comes at 9am to check us out and I have to attempt to have showing in the 16th for permanent apt? No way. I call Federic and reschedule for 4:30pm. done. Landlady comes and we begin the moving process. I run to cab stand for first cab and come get first load plus Kiss. We get first load (Mr. Pain in my Ass) up the damn stairs and into new apt. Then walk to Metro to go back for second load. Run to cab stand get cab for load two. Success! We head to Notre Dame for sightseeing and then hop on tour bus for tour of Paris. We get to area near L'arc De Triomphe and hop off for 4:30 appt. We get there a bit early and pop into a cafe for a cafe. We meet Federic at exactly 4:30pm for the appt and up the stairs we go. Federic is not friendly but French and short with us. Up to the top floor no elevator! 115 steps, buns of steel. Apt is so cute, all in Pink and Green! It looks a bit like the maybelline great last mascara tube but I love mascara and this apt is adorable! I tell Federic that I'll take it! He says okay will get in touch with owner and I have to get accepted. Whatever, I have a cat and will keep it clean. All went well.

I have to get rental insurance and somehow get the money to the agency. That is too complicated and boring explain but it took some negiotiating but it got done and once again I have beaten the french system!

Dress rehersal for CDG,more protests, possible new apt

Monday March 13th

Katie and I are up early, she is off to work and I am off to pick up Kristina from the airport. Katie and I go to the st. Michel station and catch the RER and she jumps off at her stop and I get instructions on how to cheat the system with my Carte Orange. Katie helped me get this on Sunday after the fine incident. You get a card here with your picture on it and can pay 47 euros for a month and it is unlimited in zones 1 and 2. That will get you anywhere around Paris. CDG is in zone 5. How do we swing this? Katie tells me to get off at zone 3 exit and go back in and buy a round trip ticket from zone 3 and I save 4 euros. Okay. I do it with flying colors and am at CDG with a few minutes to spare. Except there are two stops at CDG stop 1 and stop 2. I pick the first one and think I can walk from there if it is not correct. Wrong! Stop 1 is for Air France and other foreign airlines (don't have them all memorized yet) and stop 2 is American, Contential, Air Canada etc. I have to take a bus to get to terminal 2. Merde again. Bus takes 20 minutes and it is cold. Terminal 2 has A-F. What is the letter for American. Of course, no signs. French like to make you guess it is more fun that way. I get off at terminal 2 B. Nope. I ask it is terminal 2A I have to take another bus! It is now 10:15 and Kristina's plane landed at 9:20am. I finally get to terminal 2A and her flight is late - YEAH! 9:55. She should be out in a jif. I wait an hour....no Kristina...another hour ... no Kristina...another hour no Kristina. What do I do? I go to American ticketing and they tell me everyone is off the plane and through customs. I make emergency call to parents no answer. It is 6am in Dallas oops! I decided to give up and go back home. Maybe we missed each other? Another hour long trip on the train and I am home again. I tell the restauranteurs next door my situation and give them my door code and cell phone in case she comes and I am not home. I call my parents again, they answer and say what else can you do? My dad suggests I call her cell phone. Why? She is in Paris it won't work. He says maybe she did not get on the flight. HMMMMM. I decide to sit at cafe directly across from my door and keep watch. After an hour I call Kristina's cell phone just in case. She answers!!! I say Where are you??? She says Illinois, why? I ask if she did not get on the plane and she said not until tonight, why? SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT! Blonde moment. I mis-read the itinerary. It is now 4pm and whole day is wasted at fucking CDG! Well, dress rehearsal for tomorrow. I won't miss Kristina tomorrow, right?

Tuesday March 14th

I can do this today! I am up again early and to the train station. I jump on the train to CDG and am on my way. I am approaching my trick stop to get off and we wizz by! SHIT! I got on an express train! F! I get off at next stop and know it is in wrong zone. I go through the exits and back in to buy my round trip. Okay that worked. Back on track to CDG stop 2. Get their and see Kristina YEAH! Success! We get on train and we get controlled. F$%^@! I know I will get another fine for my zone mess up. He asks for my ticket and I give him my round trip to zone 4. He looks at me and says this is an express train to Paris it does not stop in zone 4. So I give him my Carte orange and he says that only goes to zone 2. I try to tell him my story and he looks at me and just sighs and walks away. He said in his head "Stupid American!" Well, audience I agree. But I did not get fined this time. Kristina laughs and says Kendall I don't know how you do it. I say I don't either. We are back at the apt and must keep Kiss awake. I make her some coffee and we get caught up. She asks me how long we have this apartment and I say actually we have to be out tomorrow morning at 10am. She asks where are we staying I say don't know. I call hotel Katie recommended ...booked. I jump on Craig's list and I find an apt in Le Marais (4th arr) for 3 weeks. I call immediately and set up an appointment at 3pm. We hang a bit more and I tell Kiss we can go see Notre Dame and then look at the apt. It is next to current apt just across the Seine. Phone rings guy from apt in Le Marais he wants to know if we can view it now? okay. We jump on metro and meet him at apt. It is on french 2nd american 3rd. Open door and it is cute! Yeah! I tell him we'll take it. Great. We must pay in cash now. Okay? We walk to ATM to pull out 800 Euros. After 3 ATMs we have a place to stay in oh-la-la hood. Let's go to Eiffel tower. Kristina and I are hungry so we stop at Bistro B for some food and to say bonjour to Pascal and friends. They are not working today. Off to Eiffel tower for some serious sightseeing. We do the whole thing after 2 hours we have seen enough. My cell phone rings it is eccentric Laurie with a lead on a cute permanent apt. It is through an agency but he wants to show it today. No. She gives me his number and I call him from the bottom of the tower. We set up the appointment for tomorrow at 10am. We are tired so now we must go back to my place organize my luggage and take big to new pad for night to get first load done. I pack up all of my stuff call landlady to check us out at 9am so I can make appt at 10am. Wishful thinking. Anyway, after we get Big in cage with his food, kiss gets her bags plus litter box and we are lumbering down the dreaded stairs again. Big is very hard to carry not only heavy but he moves around and throws you off balance. We get down the stairs and are exhausted. We have to walk to the cab stand at the corner of St. michel and St. Germain. Once we get to our corner there are cops everywhere (we'll call them them "flick") french slang for cops. They are mildly interested in Kiss and I carrying cat so they watch with shields and machine guns. Normally this would scare me but so used to it now just want to hit on them, the flick are HOT! Now I don't know if you can picture this but there are like hundreds of flick like you'd think Saddam Hussein himself was going to parade down the street. We take a few breaks and make it to cab stand. As soon as we set down our stuff the flick yell something in french similiar to CHARGE! and they storm in front of us an close down all of the streets. MERDE, MERDE, MERDE! We look at each other and smile and Kiss says what do we do now? I say go home we can't get a cab now. I am now at point of tears so tired and frustrated and hungry. We stop at crepe stand and get ham and cheese crepes and two sprites. We head back home with all of our stuff. Back up the stairs with Monsieur Pain in My ASS! Lose some weight buddy and maybe I will move you to the next pad! We finally make it up the stairs again and get out the vodka to add to our trusty Sprites and dine like French protestors! Tomorrow is another day.

So good to be Slim!

Saturday March 11

Must go to cell phone store to get more minutes on the phone. Walk to the only Orange (french carrier) store I know on St. Germain and start to rehearse in my head how to ask in french. As I am approaching the man in the back there is a woman speaking to him in English and asking him all sorts of questions. Sigh! I am next and ask him to load more minutes into my phone. No problem. That was easy! After me a family comes in and it is father, mother and daughter. They are English and father says to phone guy Parlez-vous anglais? Guy smiles looks at me and winks. I walk out overhearing English dad saying my daughter just moved to Paris and needs a cell phone. Yeah, that is not all she'll need I say to myself. Tonight is dinner with Katie (english new friend) in the Bastille and out for a late night b/c there is no early nights with Katie. Katie and I meet first at my place and then we are on the metro to go to dinner. I do the ususal and go through the gates and chunk my ticket. We get to our stop and there is a huge back up. Katie says oh get your ticket out we are being controlled. What? She said get out your ticket they are checking to make sure everyone paid and no one jumped the rail. What the Hell! I chunked my ticket at the last stop. Katie looks at me and says you're going to get fined. Awesome. I've decided to think of it as a french donation program. Mind you I am all dressed up in a skirt, tights, knee high boots that are not good for hopping the rail nor is my proper skirt! I get up to the police and give him my best English and Illinois drivers licence and say I just got here there is no sign that says you have to keep your ticket. I am not from here etc. He looks at me and starts writing out the ticket. MERDE! 35Euros!!!! But, of course, they take Visa, MC, Diners, AMEX etc to pay them. Bastards! Dinner just got very expensive. Lesson learned, keep all metro tickets all the time! Onto to dinner...Go to another cute french cafe for dinner and then she takes me to a local bar she knows. La Bar Famille? I think? Anyway, as we are walking she is telling me she knows the owner and he is really nice and she is sure he will let us in. Let us in? It is a bar, right? She says you'll see. As we approach it Katie starts to pull on the handle and it is locked. It is crowded inside and the people sitting at the bar turn around as we have to ring a door bell to get the bartender/owner to come over. Enter Slimane cute Armenian bald guy that owns the bar. He sees Katie and I and buzzes us in. Wow! We approach the bar and Slim (for short) leans over the bar and gives Katie the french kisses and says Bonsoir to me. Katie introduces me and he asks us what we would like to drink. This is all in French mind you so I get about 70% of the conversation. We get some red wine and two seats at the bar. After we sit down at our perch next to the front door katie says watch. A group of guys approach the door and ring the buzzer Slim looks up and says Ferme! Waves his hands in the air like an "X" and the guys move on. What? Katie tells me he only lets in people he knows and girls. Oh! Good plan! So, as the night progresses Slim comes over and tells us how pretty we are and we can tell him who to let in and who not. This is going to be fun! When cute boys come Katie and I give Slim the thumbs up when they are not cute they get the thumbs down. After a few more glasses of wine a cute Frenchman next to us Federico comes over and introduces himself. He is very cute and friendly and we chat a bit. He is going to some club with his not so cute friend and invites us. We say Merci but not tonight. Slim eventually closes the bar and lets katie and I stay. We hang out a for a little while longer (you know the routine with the cabs at night) and are off to home at 5am again.

Sunday March 12?

Katie and I meet at La Marais for late lunch. We end up hanging out and of course drinking wine until 4pm. Katie is staying with me b/c her toilet exploded and she has no running water. We have to go to her old apt to pick up the last of her things and then back to her condo to feed her cat get a change of clothes and then home. We walk to her old apartment which is right next to my old Hotel from past trips. it is in the 7th arr and next to our old bar where we met. Katie tells me as we are walking that we have to stop by bistro B on our way back b/c Pascal is working and she told him whenever she is in the neighborhood she will stop by for a glass of wine. Okay! We get the last of Katie's stuff and are off to bistro B. Pascal is very nice french bartender and gives us two glasses of chardonnay. I then get introduced to Gaytonne (who is from somewhere in the south of France) and i get 4 kisses from him. He laughs and mutters something to the effect of benefits of being from south of france he gets more kisses than others. Also, met Ben another nice waiter. Introduce new character Laurie (from Chicago) meeting up with her for possible chance she has to go back to states and I get her apt. Warning she is quite an eccentric. Katie warns me no one at the bar likes her and will not give her kisses. Hummm? Laurie arrives and says bonsoir to Gaytonne and he looks and her and gives her a "humpf!" with a snotty look. Pascal rolls his eyes at her and says in English what do you want to drink!? wow! This is some serious french attitude. I sit quietly and watch people, listen to Katie and Laurie talk and Pascal comes over and gives me a flower. He says en francais une fleur pour ma fleur. Oh how cute! He gives me kisses and I know I am in the french circle with these guys! We depart and head to the Metro to make the trek to the Bastille to katie's. We are standing on the platform and this couple walks down in their early 60's and I say to katie they are from teh south. In fact, I bet you they are from Texas! Katie says how do you know? I say, look at her hair, makeup, outfit and look at his outfit and ostrich cowboy boots. Okay girls this one is for you: Woman has blonde hair that is hot rolled and winged but does not move due to overkill of Aquanet. Lots of orange foundation, blue eye make-up and frosty pink lipstick. Outfit is North face jacket and dark blue gap jeans heavily starched with seam down front and brand new Nikes. Husband is also in matching Northface jacket (his and hers, cute, eh?) and Wranglers heavy starch seam down front and cowboy boots. We get on same car and frosting on cake woman grabs the poll after trains moves and she has extra long square, thick fake, french manicure nails! YUK! She giggles after she stumbles and says I almost fell. I hear the accent and it is strong. They are not from Dallas. Thank god! Katie smiles at me and I say to them so where are you from in Texas? They look at me surprised and say Denton. Damn, I'm good! We chat a bit it is their first time in Paris and they are visiting their daughter who is in school here. They say how did you know we were from Texas and I tried to be as nice as possible and say it was the shoes that gave you away. (among many other things!) Arrive at Katies and pick up groceries from her fridge were cooking at my place tonight! Fish and veggies. In bed at 12 not bad for Katie and I.

Queens, Protest, Luggage oh my!

March 9, Thursday

Sorry guys getting way behind here. Met Lindsay at Relais Odeon cute cafe near the both of us. Another rainy cold day in Paris with nothing to do but sit in cafes drink wine, eat cheese, chat and order coffee later to stay awake. We sat for 2 hours and watched all the people walk by. We decided to have a big night out tonight. I went back to my place for a disco nap (knew it would be a late night) Invited Lindsay and Ash to my place at 10:30pm for drinks. Awoke from the disco nap and needed food. I went downstairs to our friendly chinese/thai joint and got a bowl of Pho and some tea. 8 euros , not bad! Back upstairs to shower and prepare for tiny cocktail party! At 11pm Lindsay and Ash arrive and I am halfway down a bottle of red. We chat and drink until 12:30ish and are off to Buddha Bar. We jump in a cab and upon arrival the bouncer says we're closed. What? Friday and Saturday are late nights in Paris not thursday. What to do now? All dressed up with nowhere to go? Ash proposes we get into a cab and ask him what is open and give it a try. Done. Cab driver says only place open is Queen. I know, could be scary, eh? It, of course, is on the Champs Elysees where all clubs in Paris are. We go in and it is quite a scene. There are apparently no personal injury lawsuits in paris people were dancing on tables, ledges, high top tables, and hanging from a net suspended from the ceiling! It was wild. it was packed and the crowd was mixed and very young. Ash goes to the bar to get us some vodka sodas. We go upstairs where it is less crowded and you get a birds-eye view of the mosh pit! After two very watered down vodka drinks we decide to call it a night. We depart and walk down the Champs Elysees and decided food will be the cure to our sorrows. Pop into a paninni joint and get a hot melted ham and cheese! YUM! Into the cab and home we go. Still late night I think 4 or 5am?

Friday March 10
Get a call at the apt at noon from luggage delivery service they are on their way. The guy tells me not to leave my apartment. Okay? Get on internet look for apartments (no luck...still!) Get a call at 3pm he is on his way but is running late. I'll say! Get a call at 4:30 from delivery guy he is having car trouble but I will be his next stop. 5:30 delivery guy calls is stuck on the corner of my street (anyone heard of the Protests???) All of my streets are closed and there are cops everywhere. He asks if he can leave and come back on Monday, I reply NO! He asks me to come out to his car and wait with him so I can guide him to my street. Okay. I walk to meet him at the corner and can hear all of the kids chanting and the cops look like they are ready for WWIII! They have shields and machine guns full body armour etc. Hey, do you think any of you would like to join our troops in Iraq??? As opposed to chasing students with crepes wearing berets??? if you don't know why they are protesting it is because kids under the age of 26 can now be fired immediately for no reason. Of course, that is unfair! Whatever! A little french employment lesson: French are hired on contracts either permanent or temporary either way it is almost impossible to fire you once you are hired. That is why lots of French stay at jobs forever they can sleep at work and not get sacked! Sorry, a little political commentary! Pressing on we sat in Andre's van until 6:45 when things opened up and drove to my door. I have a waredrobe box and two suitcases being delivered. Mind you my doorway is probably no more than 2.5ft wide. No fat people allowed in my apt building. I nicely asked Andre if he could assist me in carrying these boxes up my 3 flights of stairs. He says...No, I just make the deliveries. Great! I open my door and the waredrobe box fits into the hallway with no more than an inch on either side. I scoot it to the next doorway and here the wooden spiral staircase that is also as wide as the hallway stares me in the face! With no choice I pick up the box and start my ascent. It goes okay until the first curve, get stuck. Not good. I unhook corner of box from iron railing and press on literally on step at a time. By the time I get to the top sweat is running down my back. Gross! This is so not french! I run downstairs for next piece of luggage which is a piece of cake compared to the waredrobe box. And one more time for last smaller suitcase. After I get into my apt the entire place is filled with luggage. Please note: current apt is approx 200-225 sq ft. Not big. Yeah! Must celebrate victory of Ironwoman competition Paris! Hooray! Go to italian restaurant next door to thai place and get a small pizza, salad, dessert and peroni beer, again 10 Euros! Latin quarter is cheap but the food sucks. Hosting another soiree tonight for Lindsay and Ash for real go out night. They come over about 11pm with red wine, vodka and mixers YIPEE! We socialize and are off to Buddha Bar (again) this time it is open and happening. Very cool music but a bit of a tourist crowd and lots of older men businesslike? Stay for a bit and then Ash gets a tip on the hottest club in Paris? VIP. On the Champs Elysees and there is a huge crowd standing at a gate with a guy on a chair literally picking people out of the crowd to let in? What is this Studio 54? Only the pretty people are allowed. Good thing we are all hot, eh? We get picked in under 5 min and are in! We go downstairs and it is so crowded! Everyone is wet with sweat and it is a bit nasty. People are at the bar drinking bottles of champagne and vodka. The ceilings are low and the inside is dark blue with mirrors all around. If I was really drunk it might make me sick and confused. We order 3 glasses of champagne before we decided what to really get to drink. Bartender comes back and it is 63 euros (approx $75) What the FFFF??? We stay finish our drinks and decide this place is not that cool. It is now 4am and of course we are hungry. We head back to my area and go to Cafe Point and they have full french cafe going. We sit outside under heat lamps and I get fois gras and a big glass of red wine. Lindsay and Ash order beef and lamb? The local cat comes by and jumps in my lap. Waiter comes by and says "bonsoir" to "le chat" the cat's name is 'the cat'. Waiter brings him cooked chicken on a plate. If I jump in the waiters lap will he feed me fois gras and red wine for free? We finish our meal and call it a night. I get home and my internet is up and Lauren is calling me on Skype. This is crazy. It is 11pm in Chicago and we start to chat. I can hear Lauren but she cannot hear me but I can instant message her. We chat for 45 minutes and then I am exhausted. In bed at 6am!